Friday, December 3, 2010

Who wants a baby? Not this girl...

right? Right? I remember the get-this-thing-outta-me-right-now feeling. I remember it well. But I did learn to adore a child recently. Her name is Clara and I babysat for her all spring, summer and early fall. She is smart, creative and charming. I suppose it doesn't really matter who or what she is, because I realized that I can love a little one. Wait--back up a minute.  This girl?
Here's what I really realized: that there is a big part of me that is Career Oriented. And that part of me wants my independence for-eva. But the soft part of me wants to know the love a mother has for her baby, because I know it's bigger than anything I've ever known. I don't regret my decision to have an abortion for one second. I would do it again in a heartbeat. But maybe someday...when I'm 35 or something....I'll ruin my flat stomach and my size 7 1/2 feet so that I can love in a new way.


  1. Make sure you take some pics of that flat tummy because whether you have a child or not the tummy will not look the same at 35 as it does now.

  2. I had a surgical abortion 5 days ago at Planned Parenthood, and read your blog in the days leading up to it. It ended up being a totally positive experience with very nice/professional doctors. I only took the ibuprofen and was surprised at how quick it was, and I had a Mirena inserted as well! I even high-fived my worried boyfriend when the doctor left the room.

    Anyway, thanks for recounting your experience from a POV I can relate to! The only emotion I've experienced has been relief, and I almost forget that I had it. We are all so lucky to have this option, and ensure that women always do.

    1. Dude--I know this is awfully late to reply...but thanks so much for letting me know about your experience. You are the person I hoped would read these ramblings.
      Thanks again--keep kicking ass and taking names.

  3. good for you for writing about this. but why does career-oriented mean that you can't be soft in your chosen job/career? seems kinda weird to separate them. You can be an awesome investment banker and a great mom too. I'm so glad you did this blog because I support you and your decision to get an abortion all the way! (and I love kids).

  4. I regret my abortions. However, I still support a woman's right to have one. I think there isn't enough counseling about the possible emotional affects afterward. Some women think they will be fine, and are not (particularly if their boyfriend or husband is pressuring them into it and they convince themselves that it's the right thing to do...then after the pregnancy is gone, realize it was not. And sometimes the boyfriend/husband leaves too). It's a very complicated decision and so many pressures mount while that child grows in side of you. I feel like I wish I knew who thseobabies would have been. I ended up having more eventually, but I still have regrets. If you read the posts at you can see how devastated some women are. I don't think an abortion is ever easy whether you are totally sure or totally not. It's just confusing.

  5. Have you seen ? It's a web site for people who do not regret their abortions. Just didn't know if you wanted to add your story to it.