Saturday, February 20, 2010

The Other Side

I think it's important that everyone with an opinion is able to express that opinion (keeping in mind that the line between expression and harassment needs to be considered). In that spirit, I am publishing two comments on my last entry that were sent to me this morning. I believe the sender didn't realize that I have control over the postings and so tried to post the second when the first didn't go through.
Since I am involved in the battle over abortion only through my experience and not on the front lines, I forget, on a day to day basis, that those who are strongly opposed exist (I find the comments slightly amusing, I must admit... cliched, really... I mean they're just so general...not specific to me at all... but not everyone's a writer... not even myself, if I'm being honest....).
So here ya go, person. It's your right to speak.


  1. You forgot to post it. I cannot believe that you feel "harassed" by my opinion. On a further note I cannot believe, as evidenced through your various posts, that you seemingly liken your abortion to an unemotional and somewhat mundane experience. It is because I have triggered an emotional response within you that you feel it is necessary to post a paragraph about it. Please don't act as though you don't feel any guilt regarding the procedure. Abortion is a heinous act of murder against the most innocent and helpless of the planet. It claims the lives of millions of innocent victims each and every day. Unfortunately your son or daughter was one of them. You are correct when you say that everyone has an is mine. Good day. P.S. I fully knew you had control over the postings (most pro-choicers do)...I was very content that you, and you alone, were able to read my post.

  2. I'm curious what they wrote! When will you publish the comments?

    And keep your head up, don't change just because a few unsympathetic people write you mean messages. Your blog is wonderful, and provides lots of help to many other women.

  3. Thanks, Anonymous! And the comments are posted under "Mirena, Mirena."

  4. This is a fantastic li'l blog you've got here! I only wish I'd had an outlet like this when I terminated my pregnancy in '93. I love that women are able to "speak" more openly and honestly about thier abortions; it goes a long way in ending the stigma! You rock, eve!

  5. There is no way I can say "you killed an innocent person" without your taking it as harassment. Otherwise you'd be a zombie, as are most people involved in the child-killing business, and the fact you are speaking out means you're not a zombie.

  6. Eve,

    If you thought John Dunkle was trying to be kind, you misunderstood him. If one reads between the lines, he believes "you killed an innocent person" but admits you would react negatively if he said it outright.

    Visit his blog. You will find that his stated view is "Because I believe we should use every legitimate means, including force, in our attempt to protect those being tortured to death, I want to hear from people who’ve been forceful." He is referring to abortion. He keeps a list of his heroes, labeled as "Prisoners of Christ," with contact information. His heroes include Scott Roeder and Eric Rudolph.

    Dunkle is a terrorist.

    Thanks for sharing your story.

  7. This is a great blog, I just found it and read through from the beginning.

    I had my abortion about 10 years ago and would have loved to have something like this to read. I felt very similar feelings to what you describe through it. Majority of relief but some pain when I forced myself to think about it. I more had regret for the situation then any regret for the choice I made. I am still so relieved I made the decision to abort but am sometimes curious about the difference in my life had i made the choice to keep it.

    I am going to be a dork and share my favorite quote with you.

    No woman wants an abortion as she wants an ice cream cone or a Porsche. She wants an abortion as an animal caught in a trap wants to gnaw off its own leg. ~Frederica Mathewes-Green

  8. Thanks so much for reading & sharing. That quote is dead on and is a better metaphor that any I've heard.

  9. I think that any open person sees both sides and making any blanket statement shows ignorance. That's why pro-choice just makes more sense to me.

  10. I stumbled upon your blog while searching for painful cramp cures.
    I think your honesty is awesome. I would like to say to anyone whom might also stumble upon your delightful and frank blog that adoption is a good option.
    I think it is important for woman to understand that the moment she chooses to have sex with a man she is putting herself at risk of conceiving a child and if she does indeed become pregnant it is important to take emotions off of the table to truly decide which option is best for the person waiting to be born. It is a person. If left to grow it will. Something as definite as an abortion should be chosen without emotion. Emotions are just another sense like touch and smell. We feel so that we can gain wisdom and react in the best manner possible for the situations that we find ourselves in.
    I am sure that this comment might sound like I am judging people based on their choices and while our choices do help define who we are I have no right to tell another that I think I am better then they are. I just know someone that can not have a baby and she is happily married and has a beautiful home and she is smart and awesome and would just be a perfect and loving Mom, but she has been on a waiting list for years.
    In cases of rape it would be cruel to ask a woman to carry a baby to term. If a baby is a product of a relationship where both parties are willing than I think it is a bit selfish to not allow a person to live simply because carrying a child for nine months is physically difficult for them. It is less than a year and a person lives.
    There is a responsibility that comes with having sex. I just think that it is important to remember that.

  11. I am a Christian but I am very Pro-Choice. I am so sick of ppl saying the Bible says its wrong & you're taking a life. Seriously? I can show any pro-lifer on this site where abortion is Biblical!!! The Bible doesn't even count a life until its a month old. A living baby! I haven't had an abortion but if I wanted 2 its my choice! I have a beautiful 6 yr old who is my world & I would have never thought of getting an abortion with him, BUT THATS HOW I FEEL & others are entitled to the way they feel & I support them! Good 4 u & your abortion!

  12. May people may not like what I have to say. I am a christan and very pro-life no matter what the circumstance. Also, this is just my opinion so do not take anything as a fact. I am a volunteer at a christan cris pregnancy center. I see many women and young girls come in and out the door wanting a pregnancy test and seeking an abortion. As I have said everything I say is my opinion but I do know for a fact that many of those who choose abortion whind up regreting the decision they made. Many dont know that just days after contraception the fetus( which is german for little) one has a heart beat. That there is truely a little tiny life growing inside of a woman. Alot of abortion clinic refer to the little one as just tissue and I know that from experience. I have seen it first hand. As a christian we are mess is our message and our life tests turn into out testimonies. So here is mine. I am 23 now but when I was 17 I found out I was pregnant. I told my mother and she pressured me into an abortion. I then was very upset because I wanted to keep my baby. It took a while for the nurse to find my baby because the there system did not go past 12 weeks. Finally the nurse said I was too far along to have an abortion. I asked how far along I was. It turns out I was 26 and a half weeks (6 and a half months) pregnant with my little girl. You I was terrified at first but now I look at my now 5 year old little girl Jacey and wouldnt want it any other way.

    So you see I have been on both sides. I just want women to also know the risk of abortion and many abortion clinics dont go by what the FDA recommends for safe abortions. They are rare but there have been deaths reported due to abortions. Most cause by the RU 486 pill. There are also risks of infection, scaring, you can because infertile, and tublar preganancy. Also while the doctor is giving the abortion they are doing it by touch and feel. They cannot see any thing. Yes they are trained to do this but it worries me that the doctor cant see anything. There is also emotional risk related to abortions. Many women (not all but many) experience a since of regret and hurt.Once again you are not a bad person its just you made a bad decision. Im sorry if I offend anyone for what I am saying that is just what I believe.
    Now I know many women would say I dont believe in abortion but if raped would change their mind.I have also been a victim of rape but did not get pregnant. I know this would be a very hard decision to make if that were to happen. But I also believe that God gives us these circumstances in order to show us his glory. There are options like adoption. Just think there are families out there that cannot have childeren and are just waiting for God to bless them with one. As I said I know as a victim of rape it would be hard to carry a child that you did not choose to have but think how good it would feel to turn that tramatic circumstance into a beautiful blessing. To know that you were strong enough to over come that and truting in God to see you though that. What a truely unselfish decision you would be making.
    Like I said I am a christian and I sin everyday just like everyone else. I am not perfect and could have no right to judge anyone. God has tought me to love everyone even the ones that have and will hurt me. If we believe in God we are suppost to love justice and walk humbly with him. Who am I to say some is wrong for what they have done or will do to me or someone else or even there self? I just want women to know that not all pro-life supporters will turn against you if you have or are thinking about an abortion. You are truely loved by me and my Heavnly Father. Through him you dont ever have to carry that burnden because that is what the cross was for. I hope all who read this understand the how deep God's love is for you and how you are perfect to him no matter what you do. Remember he knew you before you ever created. I pray that God will bless all of you who read this. Praise you wonderful and HOLY GOD.