tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72711177791814415422023-08-16T21:56:44.223-07:00My Abortion & Related IncidentsI am still stunned that 1 in 3 women have had or will have an abortion. Here's my tale.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-57452959261458350212018-09-20T09:44:00.001-07:002018-09-20T09:44:50.233-07:00It's been almost 10 years since I had my abortion.<br />
<br />
If I hadn't aborted, I would have shrunk instead of grown. My aunt would say that maybe it would have turned out to be a gift, but I disagree with my heart, gut, and soul.<br />
<br />
He was the wrong person for me. It hurts to write that, like it's slighting him for some reason. I wanted so much to make it work. He wanted that even more, but he wanted me to tamp down who I am, and my now-husband wants to see me soar.<br />
<br />
I'm back on here because we're "trying," which is a word I hate. "Encouraging" is better. "Hopeful" works too.<br />
<br />
I may even be pregnant now. My period is late. But it's been all over the place since I went off birth control anyway.<br />
<br />
I'm 36.<br />
<br />
Even if conception is harder - or unavailable - I'm still so grateful for the choice I made 10 years ago.<br />
More people are talking about abortion now. There are more stories to relate to. But not enough flavors. 1 in 4 women have abortions. That's down from 1 in 3. But still: everyone loves someone who had an abortion. Whether or not they know it.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-89111857162121153842012-01-09T11:48:00.000-08:002012-01-09T12:09:45.560-08:00Mirena, part dosAbout a year ago I started getting more pimples on my chin. This has been a sporadic issue for me throughout my adult life, so I didn't take too much notice. I went to a dermatologist and changed my topical meds. It didn't work. I changed 'em again. Still nothing. After a third round that kept the status quo, I realized that perhaps my growing, sore breasts (at age 29) were related to the zits (one's chin is a traditional place for hormonal acne). After some Googling, I discovered a legion of women with the same issues. They all had the Mirena IUD. After more Googling, I discovered that the Mirena has a kind of progestin that's linked to androgenic effects. Big, nasty chin pimples are among those. <div style="text-align: -webkit-auto;">I had the Mirena removed four months ago. And went on Ortho-cyclen, a pill with lower androgenic effects. I had my hormone levels tested, my thyroid tested; both normal. Slowly, since the extraction of the Mirena, the effects have dwindled. As diabolically pleasurable as squeezing a pimple until the pus hits the mirror can be, I'm cautiously thrilled. </div><div style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"> I wasn't given enough information about the possible symptoms from levonorgestrel, the progestin. And by not enough, I mean none. If I had been, perhaps I could have recognized mine earlier. </div><div>The breasts stayed the same size, although the soreness is gone. Sigh. No birth control is perfect. I needed new bras anyway. And for that, I recommend the ladies at Nordstrom bring you 30+ models to test-drive. </div>evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-64944368612805263192010-12-03T08:49:00.000-08:002013-04-17T20:15:39.757-07:00Who wants a baby? Not this girl...right? Right? I remember the get-this-thing-outta-me-right-now feeling. I remember it well. But I did learn to adore a child recently. Her name is Clara and I babysat for her all spring, summer and early fall. She is smart, creative and charming. I suppose it doesn't really matter who or what she is, because I realized that I can love a little one. Wait--back up a minute. This girl?<br />
Here's what I really realized: that there is a big part of me that is Career Oriented. And that part of me wants my independence for-eva. But the soft part of me wants to know the love a mother has for her baby, because I know it's bigger than anything I've ever known. I don't regret my decision to have an abortion for one second. I would do it again in a heartbeat. But maybe someday...when I'm 35 or something....I'll ruin my flat stomach and my size 7 1/2 feet so that I can love in a new way.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-42597231019611159072010-05-06T15:08:00.000-07:002010-05-06T15:29:17.929-07:00Happy Abortionersary to me.I passed my Abortionersary and didn't even notice!<br /><br />Occasionally my boyfriend or I will say, Remember when you/I was pregnant? It's usually me. And he's usually forgotten that it happened. Oh, yeah, he'll say. That was crazy, huh? <br />I believe this is a good thing. Our relationship was not damaged by that detour. The only mark it has left is my lack of yearning for a baby. <br />Not even my friend's beautiful, charming 3 year old gets my ovaries a-pumping. <br /><br />There is a truly great quote that sums up the experience. It was a comment on my last posting.<br />Thanks, commenter.<br /><br /> No woman wants an abortion as she wants an ice cream cone or a Porsche. She wants an abortion as an animal caught in a trap wants to gnaw off its own leg. ~Frederica Mathewes-Green<br /><br />Damn right. <br /><br />Happy Anniversary of freedom, Eve. Happy Anniversary of my choice.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-31355652751368479252010-02-20T13:53:00.000-08:002010-02-20T14:08:11.506-08:00The Other SideI think it's important that everyone with an opinion is able to express that opinion (keeping in mind that the line between expression and harassment needs to be considered). In that spirit, I am publishing two comments on my last entry that were sent to me this morning. I believe the sender didn't realize that I have control over the postings and so tried to post the second when the first didn't go through. <br />Since I am involved in the battle over abortion only through my experience and not on the front lines, I forget, on a day to day basis, that those who are strongly opposed exist (I find the comments slightly amusing, I must admit... cliched, really... I mean they're just so general...not specific to me at all... but not everyone's a writer... not even myself, if I'm being honest....).<br />So here ya go, person. It's your right to speak.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-28093006878627492162010-01-07T08:34:00.000-08:002010-01-07T08:41:30.172-08:00Mirena, MirenaHere's the breakdown:<br /><br />Bled for a couple of days. Stopped bleeding until my period, which was only a day late. Have been bleeding moderately since, which has been two weeks now. It was never heavy. My clinician said I may bleed on and off for a couple of months, but it should eventually become much lighter and infrequent and may even stop on a semi-permanent basis. Which she said she was initially not a fan of, but she realized that back in the day women didn't have their periods nearly as much as we do now, because they were having babies and nursing for a large period (haha) of the time. So perhaps it's not a bad thing to give one's body a break. I've been menstruating for 13 years straight (with a quick pregnancy break). I'm ready to ease up. Especially since I became borderline anemic because I've been bleeding so much over the past nine months. <br /><br />On a related note:<br />If I hadn't gotten the abortion I'd have a two month old. <br />Thank you, Planned Parenthood.<br />Wow. That made me slightly sad. But that's nothing compared to the relief I still feel.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-55209031601249234682009-12-17T11:51:00.000-08:002009-12-17T12:10:01.646-08:00In With the NewA Mirena is now inside my uterus. <br />This happened yesterday. I was pretty worried 'cause of the massive amounts of pain I went through getting the Paraguard, especially the horrid cramping well into the night. <br />This one was a breeze, comparatively. It was no picnic, to be sure. There are certain kinds of pain that are worse than others, and having my cervix cracked open is one of my least favorites. But it was over quickly and the only drawback was that my pulse was low, so I was nauseated and they had to keep me horizontal for a while. My clinician said that it was probably easier because since she took my Paraguard out (which wasn't bad at all), my cervix was more relaxed than it would have been.<br />I had a little cramping last night and this morning, but very mild. <br />Apparently it's likely that I'll have spotting for 2-3 months, but they really can't give me an idea of how this will effect me. It's different for everyone.<br />I like the ladies at this Planned Parenthood. They're down to earth and supercool. My clinician is a roller derby girl.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-33725303498576305982009-12-15T08:09:00.001-08:002009-12-15T08:37:22.516-08:00Goddamn Catholic Hospital Sons of BitchesI'm so angry right now I can barely see straight. My friend had a panic attack last night and made the unintentional mistake of going to a Catholic hospital, where they kept her for twelve hours, refused to give her medication, tried to convince her not to have an abortion and threatened to send her to a psychiatric hospital. She went in for a panic attack. It's not like she went in and said, hey priest, give me an abortion!<br />She said it was the worst night of her life.<br />There has to be something she can do. I know right now she just needs to take care of herself, but I am so furious and just want to DO SOMETHING. Like wring their fucking necks.<br />How can this be legal? How can they sleep at night?<br />And what can we do?evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-63478867490770329192009-12-10T14:34:00.000-08:002009-12-10T14:47:30.667-08:001 out of 3 is youHey girl,<br /><br />Of course, of course I'm not angry! <br />I wish you didn't have to go through this. I know your body is even more sensitive than mine, so I know you'll feel the changes that happen so quickly even more acutely. Our hips wanna pop out some kids, I guess! <br />I find it interesting that I never even asked if you were keeping it and you never brought up that possibility. We have so much stuff we need to do-- that we are meant to do--before we consider care of little ones (besides my cat). <br />If you want me to come with you I will. Having you there during my procedure meant the world to me. <br />Call me whenever. Tell me it sucks as many times as you want. <br />Dude. You're gonna be okay. Look at me! I'm fine. And it brought me and my boyfriend even closer together and I bet it will do the same for you. And ya know, as much as it sucked, I wouldn't take back any of it--although I will do everything in my power to prevent its happening again. It's one more experience we have to draw from. That's what this crazy life thing is all about; that's what we do.<br />Also, another plus for the surgical option is that you can now have an IUD put in right away (they started doing that just a couple of months after my abortion). <br />Let's have a fantastic vegan brunch tomorrow.<br /><br />Love,<br /><br />Eveevehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-59010822112131689012009-12-04T12:42:00.000-08:002009-12-04T12:54:34.381-08:00The SwitchI think I'm gonna bite the bullet. My period is currently on day 10 and without ibuprofen I was curled up in agony on my parents' couch during Thanksgiving. I made an appointment for two weeks out to switch from the Paraguard to the Mirena. I really don't like the idea of random periods and hormones, but I like heavy flows, major cramps and pregnancy a lot less. I talked to someone at Planned Parenthood, and she said that if my periods haven't gotten any easier after 8 months, they'll most likely stay this way. So I'm stuck in this lesser-of-two-evils-rock-and-a-hard-place situation.<br />Here's my prayer: Dear whomever, please let the Mirena make my periods become spotting so I don't get stuck with embarrassing situations and discolored underwear.<br />Thanks.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-82896679070490306162009-11-26T09:13:00.000-08:002009-11-26T18:44:12.422-08:00Joy to the WorldMy period has come!<br />I threw my fist into the air with a throaty "yes--yes!" as I looked into the toilet exactly a week after the due date.<br />I am going to try to go sans ibuprofen to really test the effects of the acupuncture thus far. My period usually gets really heavy and incredibly painful around day 3 or 4, so we'll see how that goes. I never thought my old 6 day cycle would seem like a relief, but I would welcome it back with open arms at this point. I'm sick of this 8-12 day business. Acupuncture is my last try before resorting to the Mirena. You hear that, Paraguard? You're gonna be toast if you don't wise up, buddy.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-15565423068886259242009-11-23T11:15:00.000-08:002009-11-23T11:20:42.840-08:00In case you're just tuning in....I had an abortion in April. I got an IUD because I never want to have an abortion again but want to practice baby-making. My period is currently 5 days late. I'm not pregnant. Unless God is messing with me.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-42947310124197422512009-11-23T08:47:00.001-08:002009-11-23T08:47:46.552-08:00Take 25 days late. I figured it was time to get another pregnancy test. I went to the nearest Walgreens and found the tests locked up. That's pretty shitty, Walgreens. The last thing I wanted to do was go ask someone to unlock the pregnancy tests. And the very nice girl behind the photo counter just had to repeat "pregnancy test?" after I asked (that's not something that needs repeating, lady), and told me that she asked her doctor for one 'cause she was paying $25 for the appointment anyway.<br />But Jesus spoke through the CLEARBLUE. I like that brand, by the way. Clear, as advertised. And Not Pregnant.<br />So WTF is going on with my period? Can the acupuncture really be messing with it this much? It's not supposed to make it later. It's supposed to make it shorter.<br /><br />I have one more test for later just in case.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-67748421159461929032009-11-20T17:12:00.001-08:002009-11-20T17:26:45.629-08:00The ScareMy period is two days late. I'm normally as regular as clockwork. So I took a test this morning. And I finally got the 'NOT PREGNANT' I was looking so hard for all those months ago. The heart beating through my chest was the same. The trying not to look while it's flashing but glancing every other second was the same.<br />I recently started acupuncture to shorten my periods and help the cramping. I don't want to rely on 800mg of ibuprofen every 6 hours. So this is my last resort before I switch to the Mirena. Which I would rather not do. But I've been so tired all the time and my acupuncturist thinks it might be because my body is putting out so much. Literally. I've been excited to find out if it's helping. But no luck as of yet. I don't even want sex, which is out of character for me. I think-- I hope it was because of the scare. I hope that tonight is different, because I hate laying next to my boyfriend and not wanting him.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-2075344322565127532009-10-27T16:03:00.000-07:002009-10-27T16:38:30.699-07:00About kidsI've been wondering about kids lately. <br />My boyfriend has made it clear that he wouldn't mind never having them, and that he'd probably have to be talked into it with his arm twisted tightly behind him.<br />I was sure I wanted kids with my ex. He had this dream once that he was teaching a big workshop on the property of a mansion and someone asked his where his wife was, because I usually taught this workshop. And he looked back at the porch at there I was, playing the guitar, with a big, swollen, 8 months pregnant belly. And I thought that was the best dream anyone had ever had. <br />I wonder if my ambitions re children have to do with what my partner wants. I always thought that if I had gotten pregnant with my ex's child, I wouldn't have been able to get rid of it. But as soon as I had this pre-baby inside me, I knew I wanted it out.<br />Here's the ironic thing: my current boyfriend is far more supportive than my last one and I think I love him even more deeply. <br />I don't know if I want a child. Maybe. My guy would make an amazing father. <br />I wonder what I would do if I got pregnant again. I hope I don't have to find out anytime soon.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-42826076141214056732009-09-03T15:33:00.000-07:002009-09-03T15:41:51.306-07:00More on that pesky IUDI just finished my 5th period since getting the IUD. After 8 days. Better. I learned a trick when I went in for my follow-up: take 800 mg of ibuprofen every 6 hours for the first three days. It's either that, or my uterus is getting used to the thing inside it... I don't want to risk finding out which, 'cause a couple of months ago my period was holding steady at 12 days and major cramping... which is helped almost entirely by the preemptive 800 mg.... <div><br /></div><div>I would recommend this thing highly to anyone who doesn't want to end up in Planned Parenthood getting a pre-baby sucked out of them. Although my sis just went in for an exam and asked about it and the doctor said not to get one unless you're in a monogamous relationship because if you get an STD the IUD can greatly complicate it. So that.</div><div><br /></div><div>I still have a bit of a baby complex. In that I really want one a lot less than I used to. We'll see how that pans out.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-67914734617259853962009-05-15T09:54:00.000-07:002009-05-15T10:27:24.228-07:00IUD updateI'm on day 11 of my period. Wait-- 11? Is that right? Yup. I just counted again. I think it might be almost over. And the cramps! Oh, mother, they're a bitch and a half. Not as bad as the night I got my IUD, but that's only because of the lack of frequency and duration. Even with 800 mg of ibuprofen they are temporarily crippling. I have found myself doubled over on several methods of public transportation. I really hope this gets better.<br /><br />Wow. I just received a call from a friend of mine who told me that she just found out that a condom broke a week ago and asked me what she should do. It's just never-ending. Thank God for the options.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-58118435328183082092009-04-27T11:25:00.000-07:002013-04-17T23:43:14.276-07:00Normalcy is wonderfulI feel like a human being again. Finally. I haven't gotten up the courage to check for my IUD strings yet (I don't know why; I'm not usually shy about those things) and I have slight cramping now and then, but other than that, I'm back in pre-pregnancy shape... or will be after a couple more weeks at the gym....<br />
And I finally enjoy sex again. Even when we were technically allowed to go for it, I still felt injured, both in body and spirit. Sex didn't seem sexual. But I'm back! It's been been about 8 weeks since I found out I was pregnant, but it seems an eternity ago. It's warm out and I'm in flip-flops, about to go to the gym. <br />
<br />
I feel like this is the ending to some Lifetime film, and I'm getting ready to ride my bike into the shiny April haze.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-52884975696988742392009-04-21T15:40:00.000-07:002013-04-17T23:44:04.443-07:00What they don't tell youOr at least, what they didn't tell ME about getting the IUD, was that it is very possible for you to be doubled over in I-can't-sleep-'cause-this-hurts-too-much pain the night after you get it. <br />
And the websites all say that "mild cramping" is normal, to be relieved by ibuprofen or Midol. I was on 1000 mg of Midol and 800 mg of ibuprofen and I still was seized by massive cramping every couple of minutes. So I did what any scared, hurting and neurotic young lady would do: Made her boyfriend give her a back rub and called the emergency Planned Parenthood hotline at 2:00am. A few minutes later I was called back by the on -call doctor, who also happened to be my abortion doctor. She sounded like she'd been woken up, but she was so kind and helpful. She said that she too had been miserable the night she got her IUD, and that some uterus(es? uteri?) have trouble adjusting and all they know how to do is cramp, but it was so worth it. And if it was still this painful in the morning, to schedule an appointment for that day. And to take something to knock myself out. <br />
So I took 2 Tylenol PM and fell asleep. And felt much better in the morning. I'm still uncomfortable, but nothing like last night.<br />
<br />
"Mild cramping" my ass. <br />
<br />
My abortion doctor is a rock star.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-90879865884114884792009-04-20T16:06:00.000-07:002009-04-20T16:16:55.534-07:00I wish my boyfriend could have either gotten the abortion or the IUDMy follow-up appointment was today. I'm fine; didn't even need an ultrasound. I did, however, get a Paraguard IUD. It's the one with a copper wire wrapped around it. I'm kind of regretting that I didn't get the Mirena, which is the one with progestin. I don't like the idea of putting hormones in my body and when I was on the pill I got my period twice a month. So I opted for the one with no hormones. I forgot, however, that I'm a total wuss when it comes to discomfort, and with the Paraguard, you're more likely to have longer, heavier, more uncomfortable periods. If the cramps I'm experiencing now are anything like the ones I'm gonna get with my period from now on, I may very well get it taken out and get the Mirena put in. You don't really get full periods with the Mirena, but you may get some spotting throughout the month. I like that I get my period. It makes me feel like I'm doin' alright. But it may go by the wayside as a sacrifice to the sex gods.<br />They told me to wait 6 months to decide whether or not to keep it. I am extremely grumpy and crampy. And I'm bleeding. I am so ready for all this to be over.<br />At least I can go to yoga in the morning.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-24599970780349340762009-04-19T20:38:00.000-07:002013-04-17T23:42:29.769-07:00and the rain came tumbling downI went to Naomi's baby shower yesterday. I was still doing my happy-no-baby dance in my head when I saw her belly; while beautiful, I knew I didn't want it. And then I felt it, and I felt his shoulder move under her taut skin. And oh, oh I thought, this is what I could have had, this little person that's part of me, this little person inside. It was mine, my pre-baby, a full centimeter from crown to rump. It was me and my boy whom I love and someone else all together. And I couldn't hold it in. Luckily I was alone in the kitchen with one of my best friends, and he held me as I silently shook. And then we went for more champagne. <br />
It was all over in a matter of minutes; I was happy again so quickly. But there it was. My elusive sadness.<br />
<br />
Follow up appointment tomorrow. Still bleeding a little.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-30469913897203956382009-04-16T15:30:00.000-07:002009-04-16T15:44:05.301-07:00Oh, to be a farmer's wifeI had coffee with my friend Erica this morning. Erica has wanted to be a mommy her entire life. She has been very supportive of me and my decision, although today she was a bit perplexed when she found out how happy I am that I don't have this thing that was, a week and a half ago, growing inside my belly. She thought I would be sad, despite being sure of my decision. I do have littlebittyeensytiny flickers when I think about this thing that would have been part me, but only when I think of an alternate universe in which I'm also a farmer's wife on the prairie, churning butter and picking daisies.<br />Erica cooed and ahhed over the very new little one that belonged to the owner of the coffee shop, while I stood admiring the bundle of joy and being overwhelmingly glad that she wasn't mine.<br /><br />Now I'm going to fill my belly with ravioli and soy sausage.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-34677137923117098032009-04-14T13:30:00.000-07:002009-04-14T13:33:24.369-07:00It's not over yet....I'm bleeding again. I haven't for about 3 or 4 days, so I really thought I was done. I'm a little worried, but it's not too heavy, so I'll just chalk it up to randomness and leave it at that. I've also been a little crampy, but I'm not gonna take anything for it, because I like having a conversation with my body instead of blocking it out.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-13518537674639416802009-04-13T17:05:00.000-07:002009-04-13T17:10:54.744-07:002 weeks or 14 days or 336 hoursNo yoga, no weights, no running, no stairmaster, no heavy lifting. And no sex, obviously.<br />I'm going nutso. <br /><br />Fact: what would be a vacation if it was self-imposed is frustrating since it's imposed by the gods at Planned Parenthood.<br /><br />My follow-up is for next Monday, and if the gods deem it right, I'll also get my IUD. And I'll be able to work out.<br /><br />I feel FINE. Just cranky.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7271117779181441542.post-10940947330274079712009-04-10T15:08:00.000-07:002009-04-10T15:19:57.547-07:00Interview with Babs, #2Dream interview with Barbara Walters:<br /><br />Babs: Wow, Eve, it looks like you've make quite the comeback. Do you have any feelings of regret or sadness?<br /><br />Me: Well, Barbara, only if I make myself. If I think very hard about how I deliberately killed part of myself that could have grown up into a person, I feel slightly sad. But when I think of the fact that I'm not pregnant, or see a little kid in the grocery store, I think, yippee! And do my happy dance.<br /><br />Babs: Is it true that your happy dance includes balloons? <br /><br />Me: Yes. In my head there are balloons.<br /><br />Babs: Are you still feeling any physical residue? <br /><br />Me: Well, yes. I have very slight cramps and a very little bleeding, and I tire more quickly than usual. And my body still thinks it's pregnant. My boobs are still sore and swollen. But it's more in my head now, I think. I know I can't have sex for another week and a half, and I'm actually okay with that. I think I'm still a little battle scarred.<br /><br />Babs: And how is your relationship?<br /><br />Me: It seems to be back on track! I'm moving in with my boyfriend (which we'd been planning before all the shit hit the fan), but I hadn't been looking forward to it during the last few weeks.<br />Now I'm excited again and mentally decorating! <br /><br />Babs: If you had to, would you do this again?<br /><br />Me: In a heartbeat.evehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00246181844886537899noreply@blogger.com0